I watch the human experience by witnessing so many different things each day. It always amazes me how much time, effort, and resources people will expend trying to get back at someone else for a wrongdoing—or for something they may perceive to be a wrongdoing.
I totally get it. You are hurt, and you want to hurt them back.
However, there comes a point when you are simply wasting your time and resources trying to get someone else to acknowledge the original pain and suffering—or trying to get them back by eliciting the same.
I ask: Why?
Will it change the event?
Will it save you money?
Will it give you peace?
Will it change anything for the better long term?
If you answered no to these questions, then is it worth it? And what are you doing to yourself in the process?
The best revenge is to move forward and live your best life—not shackled by the anger and pain of the situation. Let it go.
Now, for those who are forced into these situations by another person’s petty need for ego or pain retribution—what then? What happens when the person creating the pain is acting toward you, not the other way around?
This is the sticky wicket, isn’t it?
The first step is to not let them torture you emotionally. Walk through the situation in stages. Make a list of what you can control and what you cannot. Focus on the things you can control.
Do not attach emotion to those items—approach them with clarity and purpose.
Surround yourself with strong people who can support you and help fortify your wall as you walk this path. Continue to grow. Seek calm in the people, spaces, and reading that nourish you.
Take comfort in the knowledge that you are not debasing yourself to get even. Be proud that you refuse to roll around in the gutter. Instead, observe the other person with a sense of compassion for their limited evolution in humanity.
Rise higher. Grow stronger.
Soak in the knowledge that they are no longer truly a person in your life—they are only orbiting.
In the meantime, take no nonsense. If legal intervention is needed, pursue it. If cutting all ties is necessary, do it.
It never feels good to feel as if your life is being controlled by another. Find ways to close those doors and stop staring at them. Walk toward the things you can control and the actions that make you feel stronger and more empowered.
In the end, when you look back on your life, do not regret what you gave away to those who did not deserve it.
Instead, celebrate what you built with the ones who did.
Peggy
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